Personal Works Cited???


It is an observable truth that those who refuse to learn from stupidity are bound to repeat it. That is why I wonder at the works cited paper. In this post we are going to focus on the question, “Does the works cited paper truly increase learning?” We will be examining three basic realms in which the research paper falls miserably short. It is proposed that the research paper is a waste of time, is inaccurate, and bound to previous learning.

The works cited paper is a colossal waste of time. The very idea that a student is required to research a field or topic that has already been researched is insane. The very phrase, “Personal Works Cited Paper” is oxymoronical in nature. The student is required to write his own thoughts on other people’s thoughts? If they have already written on the topic, wouldn’t it be more profitable to write on a different topic or if the teacher insists on a certain topic let them read what is already written? Does this logic apply to any other area in life? Imagine going to the local car dealer and after examining ten to twenty automobiles you are told in the interest of fairness and research to go build your own? Similarly, why should the student write his own paper when there are many references already written? If I am to write a paper and truly call it my paper, I shouldn’t be using anyone else’s ideas. (1)

This leads to my next point. Research papers are grossly inaccurate. They are the philosophical equivalent to a grungy buffet where you have no idea where the food came from or who (if any) washed their hands before handling your pizza. Because a research paper must have different sources the student is left with a huge variety of unhealthy ideas from a myriad of perspectives only one of which can be right. Supposedly this is to help the student be discerning in their study, but apparently that tactic didn’t work because there are still undiscerning people writing alternative papers (who ironically had to read various viewpoints).(2) If a student is required to write based on the research of others, what if the sources are wrong? Furthermore, as a student studies, he is invariably placed in a position of compromise, as he may be incapable of discerning a matter and may purport several untruths based on the research of faulty individuals. Research papers are also based on outdated material as the materials studied have all been written in the past.

Finally research papers are cyclicic, as they continue to plunge mankind into a sort of vacuous whirlpool of ideas. A student may have a completely new thought but in order to meet the criteria for the paper must suppress and smother the spark of intellect. (For actual case studies the writer recommends checking out the lives of persecuted geniuses such as Galileo, Edison, and the guy who invented Totinos pizza). This fact is one which all students should be intently concerned about for the simple reason that all intellectual progress is hindered by it. It must be asked, where did the source get its source? If we follow this idea far enough, someone started it all. Someone had to not cite his sources! Why is a student required to cite his sources, when the sources he cites from originally where not cited?   The implications of this fact are immense. Someone is in control of our entire intellectual system and therefore created the works cited as a tool for his own diabolical scheme. (3)

The world is being held in darkness as students everywhere are wasting precious time on inaccurate research determining preconceived conclusions. The only way to stop such a mad menace and deliver the thinking mind from certain doom is to ban the work cited paper. I realize this is no easy task, as it has grasped the intellectual world in a strangle hold (4), but there are subtle ways to let your mind shine and carry the truth to our needy world. Next time you write a works cited paper, you must determine what you are to write on before-hand and simply add those who agree with you, or if needed add the most ludicrous and unbelievable source you found and add it out of context, at the very least, write your paper and then add an outline. This is the only sane way to recover what we have lost in circles of academia worldwide.



1: Live Your Own Life, N.O. Learning, Shortsighted Press 2001

2: Never Trust a Book, S. N Eacky, Whatever Publishing house 2009

3: The Schizophrenic Guide to the Universe, Al. Fraido, Basement Publications

4: Sunday Morning Comics, Marmaduke goes to Space